Wisdom for Life, Part 6, Being Wise About Conflict, July 29, 2012

Wisdom for Life, Part 6 – Being Wise About Conflict
Prov. 10:17 NKJV, NLT, Prov. 27:5-6 NLT, NKJV
– every relationship we have is vulnerable to attack, to break apart the relationship
Ps. 133:1 “How wonderful and pleasant it is when brothers live together in harmony!”
– Three different ways people deal wtih conflict:
1. some avoid and withdraw
2. some tend to explode after they have stewed & stewed and finally boil over
3. some people thrive on conflict
– healthy relationships are not absent of conflicts but they have the ability to resolve conflict in a positive and healthy way
– 6 ingredients to wising up about conflict
1. decide to love (Prov. 10:12 NIV, 1 Peter 4:8)
  – Jesus sasy they’ll know they’re Christians by their love
2. forgiving offenses (Prov. 19:11 NIV) – we need to take God seriously, but not take ourselves seriously.
  – forgiveness is simply the choice to not hold onto an offense. A refusal to forgive a person is unwise because it opens our lives to satanic power and chokes off God’s grace. When we refuse to forgive, the person’s offense keeps victimizing us again and again, because we dwell on it continually it ends up poisoning our lives with bitterness.
3. open yourself (Prov. 27:5-6) – direct confrontation is always better than unexpressed love
  – we all need to open ourselves up to correction because we all have blind spots
4. admitting our role (Prov. 28:13 NIV) – my relationhship with people is more important than being right and definitely more important than the offense
5. keeping anger in check (Prov. 29:22 NIV, Eph. 4:26)
6. correct carefully (Prov. 9:7-9 NIV)
– we need to wise up about conflict in our lives. We do this by deciding to love, forgiving offenses against us, opening ourselves to correction, admitting where we’ve been wrong, keeping our anger under control, and only then offering correction carefully.